100QBM.com Blog

We live in a time where people have begun to live together before marriage more and more. They do this for many reasons.

Some swear that it has made their relationship stronger because they choose to be together without the need of the marriage license. Others acknowledge that it can cause a feeling of less security.

Couples say they are cohabiting without being married for a variety of reasons. Some do it for the convenience of being able to see each other more.

Others do it because they have had bad marriages in the past and they want to test the their relationship before tying the knot again.

Then there are the ones that just want to test their relationship out before making any commitment for no other reason than that.

While in the religious community premarital sex is frowned upon, living together quite often encourages more of it to happen.

This is a sin according to most teachings anywhere in the world. Sex without the right commitment can lead to unwanted children and the problems that go with them.

So is it wise for a couple to live together before marriage? Do they really make their relationship stronger by doing so? We need to look at some information that actually says it is not good to cohabit prior to marriage.

The studies actually prove couples are better off to wait until after they are married to live together.

Other than the fact that premarital sex is a sin there are 7 other main reasons not to live together before being married. These 7 reasons are listed below along with explanations and statistics.

Living Together Before Marriage:

1 – It has been reported that a couple that cohabits together prior to being married are less likely to get married to one another. Forty percent of the people that liver together without the benefit of marriage will breakup before ever marrying.

2 – Even if these couples wind up marrying they have a higher rate of getting separated and/or divorced. This fact was reported in the Journal of Marriage and Family. This journal stated that the couples that lived together prior to marriage had an astounding 50 percent higher rate for disruptions in their marriage than those that did not. Reports from studies done in several universities report these rate to be 50% to all the way to 100% higher.

One study has reported that the divorce rate is higher for those that lived together before marriage opposed to the couples that did not. Also that the longer these couples did live together before getting married the risk of divorce was even higher.

3 – The observation of 10 studies on cohabitation showed that the couples that did it without marriage did not have as high a quality of a marriage than those that waited. They also had a higher right of the marriage dissolving. It also showed that these couples that lived with each other without being married had more marriage counseling, separate more, and did not hold marriage in as high of regard, as the couples that waited to be married to live together.

4 – Some of the studies showed that the people cohabiting prior to marriage have a higher rate of arguing and even violence. Couple tend to be not as positive and more negative in these relationships when trying to solve disputes with one another. There is also more aggressive verbal behavior in these couples due to poor communication skills.

5 – Sex is not the best either in these relationships that involve premarital living together. A leading national institute for researching healthcare report that the couples that wait to have sex until after marriage and who are faithful in the marriage have a more satisfying sex life compared to the ones that lived together before marriage.

6 – The couples that live together prior to being married have and higher amount of behavior issues. The have higher rates for:

1.      Issues with alcohol

2.      Aggressive behavior happens twice as much.

3.      More marital insecurity and instability.

4.      Triple the amount of depression.

5.      More violence against the women.

7 – The children can also get negatively impacted when the parents are not married and living together. Because these couples have all the problems mentioned here this just naturally seeps down to the children.

There can even be a higher rate a child abuse in these couples, or when the mother is living with a boyfriend without being married. The children can have more behavior issues and lower scores in school too.

As you can see by this information it is better to wait until after marriage to live together.

Get free questions on dating, love and relationships by downloading your free copy of the 100 Questions Before Marriage sample eBook or 1000 Questions For Couples.